The sister of one of the girls involved in the Arizona tragedy has spoken. This opinion piece was dated September 14th by the Daily Star. Here is a reponse by Kuwait2005:
- "Talking is usually my favorite therapy" 1st paragraph- That is why God Gave us two ears and one mouth- So we speak less and listen more. If you did that, you would not have said what you said in this lousy opinion piece.
- "They turned both my family and my best friend's family tragedy into the hot gossip of the week" 2nd paragraph- Yes it is a tragedy by all means, and no this is not hot gossip. This is news. When prominent individuals, or their relative, get into trouble, they become today's news. Just because the Kuwaiti media is not covering this does not make it gossip! It is still factual news. Besides, remember a guy names De Gains? Do you think his family are in this tragedy too? You say yes but you don't mention him. Why? Because you are a self-centered, typical, snobby Kuwaiti girl who thinks laws were made for the poor. This is what drives this story!
- "Did anyone stop to think how these two scared women are feeling"- Not really! They are in the USA where nobody is above the law. The De Gains family, who you fail to mention, are worthy of more sympathy and condolences.
- "I felt sick to my stomach. What kind of society do we live in? When does someone's tragedy become an amusing topic of discussion" 3rd paragraph- Society is not to blame. This is a direct consequence of the actions of these two girls. As to what kind? The kind where relatives of prominent figures are shoved into the news once something happens, just like any other society that has some sort of democracy. As for your sickness,there are many good doctors all over Kuwait, unless you want to be sponsored by the Ministry of Health for treatment abroad, which you can if you wanted to!
- "Do these people not have sisters? Do these people not have a conscience?"- Yes they do. Most have a clean conscience that realizes when to sympathize with the plight of others, and when not to. "Crude judgments" is just being hypocritical! But being who you are, the last sentence would be a redundancy (go look it up in the dictionary!).
- "I am not condoning what my sister and friend did" 4th paragraph- Please do. You think people care what you do now!
- "Life has a funny way of showing us"- Funny? What is funny about this whole episode?
- "Let us just take this story with a grain of salt"- A man lost his life and you do not have the decency to use better wording out of respect for the victim. I am surprised you made it fine through 24 years of life. You come off as even snobbier than the other two girls!
- "Posting cruel comments about them in an attempt to feel better about yourself"- If news commentary became what you said it is, then why not post a decent opinion where you acknowledge the loss of the De Gains family instead of pointing at people? Told you, you are even snobbier.
- "They have strong, beautiful souls"5th paragraph - Save the cliches.
- "Other stories will come along and take its place"- Thank you. Finally you say something that is not offensive, and true!
- This is an appalling opinion piece that reflects your true skewed image of yourself and things around you. People are not slaves and you their master for you to label, point fingers, and tell them what to do. This is the age of technology, where even people in remote locations can find out what is going on around the world. Show some decency and respect to others.
- One thing I looked for in your opinion piece is an apology, or at least condolences, to the De Gains family. Nothing was there which again reflected the "high" moral and behavioral standards you hold. Offering an apology or condolences is not by any means an admission of guilt. It is simply an admission that a man lost his life, and that we as human beings sympathize with the De Gains family.
- Near the end, you mention how this is news today, and something else will be the news tomorrow. Thank you. I have been trying to make this point ever since the story broke! This story is already dying down, and nobody really cares what happens, except for a few family and friends.
- Finally, before you start getting defensive and point fingers at others, you must know that your fathers social standing is driving all of this. If it was two other girls named A and B, this story would not have made it into the news cycle in Kuwait. But since it is girls C and D, this story rocketed across the Atlantic and back a few million times. You made the Dean's Honor List in 2001. You should know better. This is life.
12 comments:
Well put.
Abdul.. you are thoughtfull.
My condolences to the De Gains family.
Shahad, I wish you and your family the best. It's hard to be the focus of the "NEWS", but this is human nature to pass it around and it will always be. Technology had changed, that's all. People will always be curious to what happens around them: it can be me, him, her, them, you don't know.. that's human nature every where. But don't go calling the Kuwaiti people names and leading double lives because "NEWS" came to and around you.
stinni and simper,
Thanks for the comments. You know something just came to my mind. The accident happened at 2.30am Wednesday 14/09/2005 Arizona time making it 2.30pm same day in Kuwait! I am starting to suspect this big time unless the Daily Star was a nightly paper. Otherwise, either the date on the opinion piece is wrong, since press runs are done in the a.m. hours everyday making it impossible to publish the piece in time, or something is up. American media say 2.30am Wednesday. Hmmmmmmmm
Ok. It seems this piece does not start with a dateline but an actual date narrative. Therefore, it was not published on the 14th. Thanks for the semi-colon tip son ;)
abdul,
her opinion was meant to address the people that are continusously gossiping and posting cruel comments on the internet about her sister, its not a commentary on what happened nor is it an apology to the victim's family. It was not intended to be one! How do you know, maybe she wrote a letter to DeGain's family, maybe she posted an apology in one of arizona's newspapers, you don't know what communication passed between her family and the victim's yet you are quick to sit and judge! Besides writing an apology for the victim in a kuwaiti newspaper will not reach the audience she seeks. Its pointless.
but commenting about Kuwaities reactions in a kuwaiti newspaper is completely appropriate. Because to be honest the reaction is quite outrageous. people in the states would never pass on bluetooth messages, emails and texts about some arrested person they never met personally. The kuwaiti society in this respect is sickening! News is news but it doesn't mean slandering a person's reputation so wickedly. For god's sake they are not the first kuwaiti girls to drink, nor are they the first to drive under the influence. for real.
Last but not least, do you not realize that the more you blog about this the more attention you get from fundamentalists and the stronger their case for lobbying against sending girls abroad will be! God, don't you guys want to progress for the better? Or do you enjoy living in the dark ages being governed by bearded cavemen? Think about that before you go blogging about something that supports regressive (and repressive) society.
Luminous,
Thanks for the illumination ;) No pun intended. A point I wanted to reply to was about making an apology in a Kuwaiti paper that would not reach its audience. This was not the case when, in more than one court case, American lawyers used Arabic/Kuwaiti newspaper clippings to prove their point. I think the girl had that in mind when she wrote her "opinion" and did not want to cause more trouble by mentioning anything about De Gains. As for communication between her and the De Gains family, you are right. I do not know if there is any, but I know what is published in the media, and I have a right to respond, a right gurantees by the constitution. The American that is ;) This put aside, her opinion does not come off as remorseful or one that is well stated. To me, this is a very defensive piece of writing that is trying to blame others, such as society, for reacting this way. As for bluetooth etc., if the Americans had bluetooth technology widespread, yes they would do the same as Kuwaities do. Human beings are the same everywhere. Humans are curious by nature. Technology only aids that curiosity. As for the fundamentalists, they are the last to worry about. They know about this story but no one has the courage to bring it into the mainstream. Why? Because they are running after their interests and this case will not help their interests. They know. Did they jump? Not really. Do they care? Not really. They are not the first Kuwaiti girls to get in trouble abroad. However, the social status of their fathers, and technology, makes Mesa local media just a click away. It's their misfortune.
Anon,
Many girls fall in trouble everyday abroad. Some are taken to the cleaners like this case, others go under the radar, and live happily ever after. Got Milk? This incident will not affect the government's policy of sending males and females abroad. This is not the point but the matter of having common sense, and acting cautiously abroad. Some people have alot of it, others have little. These stories are unfortunate, and this blog is not trying to make light of what happened. However, since an opinion was voiced, a counter-opinion is offered. C'est la vie...
Tata Botata,
Thanks for the comment. How do you know he's not a n.... :P Just kidding! As for the bacon....?
Take it easy all and thanks for the comments. This is not good vs. evil. Only simple news that is dying down...
I hate how ppl try to justify these girls actions. Some ppl complaining and whining, how we shouldnt talk about what these girls did. Why the hell not? Why should we keep our mouths shut when we see wrong doings? Talking about the issue does help! In fact it raises awareness! Its not that they came from well known families that makes this a big deal, well not to me anyways. It is the fact that they are Muslim girls that were stupid enough to not gaurd their reputation (who also happen to be Kuwaiti). Kuwait is a small nation, we are a family, and when something like this happens, we need to talk about it! We need to be aware what our youths are up 2 these days, and the negligence of the parents. This is the only way we can help eachother. We learn from our mistakes. These girls should serve the up most justice for what they have done. Theyre should not get a special treatment just because they come from a prominent family. I hope these girls and their families, along with other girls who fool about behind their families backs and take their families trust for granted will learn a lesson from this. Allah will punish and even humiliate those who commit wrong, either in this life or the hereafter. So think twice about the actions you commit and Fear Allah.
Attention Shahad…
Do you think that beautiful souls are usually forgiven after hitting someone, dragging them for 300feet and leaving them to die in the street?? Does a beautiful soul LIE and claim hitting a pole instead of a human being when the car is covered with blood?
I believe that men and women are equal, and I have nothing against them smoking/ doing drugs/ or drinking if that’s what they chose to do “and you chose to ignore”, but your beloved beautiful souls were driving while intoxicated... waaaay above the legal limit. They caused a man his life how can we sympathize with that?
Accidents do happen but it’s only called an accident if you have nothing to contribute to its occurrence, which isn’t the case in your sister & friend ACCIDENT.
Shame on you blame the Kuwaiti society, the society you live in and been a part of and had your share of gossip in. Being her sister doesn’t give you the right to condemn what news we get how we exchange it. There have been scandals in the past and we “the society” have treated them equally, and we “the society” make sure that we utilize whatever technology we have at the time, and I don’t think that any of it sickened you.
Plus, don’t give us that s*^t about don’t you have sisters or what ever because it doesn’t apply here. Your sister dragged you and your family into the mud so I hope you can still love her and support her on your way.
Cheers!!
cali_q8,
I agree completely. We live in a reasonably free world, and have a right to know, and react as we wish. Trying to control this when things get personal only shows weakness, rather than strength. Cheers
cali_q8
true
Luminous, if the sister's article was written to Kuwaitis, why was it written in English and submitted to an English-language daily that, while printed in Kuwait, actually comes out of Lebanon (as well as the US and Paris), and which, to my knowledge does not have a large readership in Kuwait, even among the expatriate community?
Being that her article was written in English, the English-speaking populace has a right to evaluate the content. I hope that the almost flippancy with which Todd DeGain's death was treated was a result of her over-riding concern for her sister and lack of language skill. It certainly did nothing to gain sympathy for the sister among my friends.
How ashamed all Kuwait must be to have these two women represent your country. The two drivers that killed Mr DeGain, were apparently returning home from a night of drinking around 2:30am.
The first driver was charged with *extreme* DUI, having struck Mr DeGain and dragged the body several hundred feet. The second driver, also, DUI, then struck the body as well. After a pause, both vehicles sped off (leaving the scene of a serious accident). The first drive, being so drunk, hit a light pole, and the pair was caught shortly thereafter. If you would like more details, just ask: this is only 200m from my house!
Both women are ASU college students, and Kuwaiti citizens. Fearing that they would flee the country, their passports were taken. This does little good, you don't need a passport to *leave* a country. Many feared that they would never see a trial.
Both women reportedly are of powerful families with government connections in Kuwait. Perhaps this would explain why this afternoon, the charges were reduced to simply "leaving the scene". Two drunk little rich college girls skate. A father lies slaughtered in the street.
How proud Kuwait must be!
I guess it pays to have friends in the Kuwait government!
I'm sorry Ms Bishara that you are troubled that others are saying nasty things about your sister. Did you ever consider that their comments are justified?
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